Why Your Relationship Should Have ZERO Expectations

Agreements Over Expectations: A Healthier Way to Love

In relationships, it’s easy to fall into the trap of unspoken expectations. You expect your partner to call when they’re running late, to know what you want without saying it, or to just “get” how you feel. But here’s the truth: expectations can silently build resentment, while agreements build connection.

Expectations are assumptions. They live in our minds, often unspoken and unclear. When they aren’t met, we feel disappointed or hurt — not because our partner broke a promise, but because they never knew what the rules were in the first place.

Agreements, on the other hand, are clear and intentional. They’re conversations where both people come together and decide how they want to show up for each other. “Let’s both put our phones away at dinner” or “Can we check in with each other before making big plans?” These aren’t demands — they’re mutual understandings.

Making agreements invites collaboration. It shows respect for your partner’s perspective and creates a foundation of trust. It also removes the guesswork and lets love grow in clarity, not confusion.

So next time you catch yourself expecting something, pause and ask: Have we agreed on this? If not, it might be time for a loving, honest conversation.

Love thrives when it’s communicated — not assumed.

In addition to hosting The Sean Show on B105.7, Sean Copeland is a licensed mental health therapist.